Bye, bye Superwoman

I had the opportunity to be a speaker at my church’s women’s conference last weekend.  While I was there I heard an amazing presentation by an even more amazing woman named Erin Brown  (  Her topic really slapped me in the face.  It was “I’m Not Your Superwoman.”  Can you say “Wow!”

Her presentation talked about the pressure that we put on ourselves as women to be everything to everybody.  Hearing her presentation made me reflect on my recent decision to be a stay-at-home mom.  For years I’ve been a “superwoman” juggling career, community involvement, church obligations and family.  This year the juggling act became overwhelming.  I knew that I was getting out of control when I found myself working at home ALL the time.  My 5 year old daughter began complaining that I was always in a meeting.  My husband and I were ships in the night passing on the way to our next work meetings.  I felt out of whack and unhappy.  And we all know the saying “When mama ain’t happy, nobody’s happy!”

It was hard tearing myself away from a career that spanned over 15 years of nonprofit management.  But for me it was the right choice.  I’ve made a personal decision to put my family first, and for me that means staying at home, doing part-time consulting and managing the family full-time.  It’s not a decision for every working mama, but it works for me in this season of my life.  It gives me time to really be there for my family, pursue goals that I’d put on the shelf and forgotten, and most importantly take time for me.  I’m a firm believer that we women are amazingly strong.  We’re stronger than we know — but we all have our limits.  The reality is that Superwoman is a burnt-out, overloaded, crazy woman who rarely puts her needs first.

Ladies, the superwoman myth is just that – a myth.  We CAN do it all, but just not at the same time.  It’s time that we start reprioritizing and making decisions that work for us.  Forget the world’s expectations.  Life is short and at the end we all want to look back and know that we spent our time where it counts.  For me reprioritizing meant being a stay-at-home mom.  For you it may mean letting go of activities that waste your time.  Or it could mean abandoning your career to pursue your true dreams.  Or maybe it just means reserving a weekend every month just for you.  Whatever it means, it’s time to put what’s important to YOU first.

So are you ready to burn the S on your chest and replace it with what really matters?


6 thoughts on “Bye, bye Superwoman

  1. My goodness this is beautiful! I applaud you for the realization that YES we can do it ALL! But you choose to do it YOUR way! Oh my I love you, appreciate you and thank God I met you! Blessings as we both journey together! whew! I am hooked lol

  2. Your blog is great, and I’m a little late.
    Glad your heart is on the mend, but I won’t pretend
    That I don’t miss you like crazy! My spirit has been so lazy
    But your words made me smile, and laugh, and think…
    I mean it for real, I want to visit! *wink*
    Keep on walking and writing — you are blessed!
    Love your dear friend Arika

  3. I still reminisce about the presentations made by each amazing speaker and soooo agree with you about Erin Brown’s awesome presentation. Erin hit the nail right on the head with her topic “I’m not your Superwomen”, her presentation caused me to truly reflect and take the necessary steps on how to prioritize the important things (and let go of the things that hinder my growth). And most importantly…learning the art of saying…NO!

    Your dynamic presentation….“Get up, Get over it, Get on with your life – You’re too amazing to stay down”….geez….I still have goose bumps thinking about it. I think we used up quite a number of boxes of Kleenex! When we went through the “myths” that keep us down, I was able to identify with approximately…..ALL of them 🙂 !!!! I was having all kind of “AHA” moments. I honestly cannot tell you how many burnt-outs I have had because of believing in these ‘myths’…..(exhale)….thank you! Your transparency and your sharing are life vests for many of us women who are drowning in our seas of ‘do it all…disappointments….hurt…depression, etc’. Thank you again and I appreciate you!

    Oh by the way, I’m looking forward to reserving a weekend every month just for me….. 😉

    • Asenath — you are such an amazing woman yourself! So glad you enjoyed the presentation and this post. Take care of yourself, girl. Remember to say “no” to all that is unnecessary and say “YES” to you!

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